Losing Your Identity
“Drugs damage relationships. There’s no question getting high drives a wedge between family, friends, significant others, coworkers, etc. But what about the relationship with ourselves.
“Using drugs is an all-consuming activity. Some can say they are a functioning addict, going to work, school, showing up at social events, but in all reality, they are crashing. The further we delve into our relationship with drugs, the more attached we become. When getting high is top and only priority, we don’t care about others and we certainly don’t care about ourselves.
“Loss of identity can be a difficult thing to deal with. Years of drugs disconnect us. Hobbies, interests, personality, ambitions and dreams are tossed to the wayside. The only person we identify with is the one we know on drugs. It’s impossible to be present in the moment when one is using. Our physical being may be in one place, but our mind is somewhere else. Lost.
“Personally, I lost who I was. For years, I was only concerned with numbing out the world and all the bad feelings I tried to run away from. I forgot what I liked and disliked. I stopped caring about the hopes and aspirations I had for myself and my future. I didn’t know what I wanted or where I was going. I was digging myself into a hole that grew deeper every day.
“Getting sober makes us reconnect with ourselves. Once I was sober, I found I could no longer hide behind the mask of my addictions. My thoughts and actions were my responsibility. Drugs couldn’t be used as an excuse. Truthfully, I feared who I was as a person. I had done a lot of things that weren’t things to be proud of. Without drugs, I felt vulnerable. It was time to get real and mend the most important relationship of all; the one with myself.
“Everything is a process. I couldn’t expect to wake up one day and suddenly love the person who I was. Learning who I was and what I was about took definite time and effort, and is still a work in progress. Being sober gives you the opportunity to do this, one I would never have had using drugs. Feeling again means being able to recognize what makes me happy and know how I am inclined to use my time. I can distinguish what upsets me and what I am against. I am conscience of what I am doing and can steer my actions in a direction that support the person I am becoming.
“Nothing good comes easy, but the rougher the road, often the more rewarding the result. Finding yourself can come across as corny, but it is necessary. Having a strong set of values and knowledge of who I am as a person gives me more reason and drive to be a sober, successful and ethical human being. Relationships in sobriety are vital and it all starts with the one closest to home; our self.” —Lauren Narconon Graduate
The Narconon program can help you find your way back from the life addiction has created for you or your loved one. To learn more contact us today.