I Didn’t Think I would Live Past 27
“I arrived at Narconon Louisiana in June 2017, just having been released from the hospital and a mess, to say the least. I already knew that and seeing what I was doing to my family and how far down I’d dragged myself, led me to believe it was time to give up the way I had been living. For good.
“As expected, I had good days and bad days while on the Narconon program. The program wasn’t easy. It was hard work, but the staff and the students genuinely helped get me through it. I had a chance to work through a lot of things I wasn’t dealing with in my life, from admitting that part of the reason I was using was so I didn’t have to deal with my grandfather passing away, to covering up the guilt I felt about what I was doing to myself and the people around me. I covered up EVERY feeling I had.
“Taking an honest look and literally seeing my downward spiral in every aspect of my life, was one of the hardest, but best, things I have ever had to do. Putting down on paper the kind of person I was while on drugs was difficult. From the constant lying to people I cared about to the lack of concern for my own well being or anyone else’s, was a reality I needed to face so I could see the kind of person I had to fight like hell and never be again.
“I removed myself from situations and people who wouldn’t have any positive effect on staying sober, whether it was ’friends’ I used with or past relationships with people who cared more about getting high than being concerned with their girlfriend OD’ing. I needed it all to stop. I needed to be the one to stop it and cut all ties from that life.
“I started to care about myself and where my life was headed instead of pleasing all the wrong people. Basically, the reality is I was going nowhere and well on my way to being dead by age 27 and the scariest part is I was starting to accept an early death. After going through the program and finally confronting all the things I was covering up, I basically started over. I feel like I got my life back and all the pieces of myself that years of using had covered up.
“I smile again, I laugh and I regained the ability to enjoy the things around me that I’d forgotten all about. I am a real person again.“ — AL, Narconon Graduate
