I Have a Better Life Thanks to Narconon
When I arrived at Narconon last September, I was utterly hopeless. Emotionally distraught, physically incapacitated, and addicted to drugs.
The first thing I did was withdrawal and it was rough, but I made it through. Over the years, I’ve traded one addiction for another, convincing myself it was all right to use certain drugs but not others. This may have physically saved my life on some occasions, but it didn’t change the fact I always needed something just not to be sick.
After two weeks of vomiting and another week of adjusting to sobriety, I realized I was no longer sick; I could eat, I could sleep, and I was completely sober. This was huge. I never thought that would happen. This was my first big win at Narconon - the fact that I could be sober.
Next, came sauna. Here, my hopelessness faded into anger. I was angry at everyone and everything all the time. I resigned myself to this anger just like I resigned myself to needing drugs. It’s just the way it was. The Sauna Supervisor told me I’d handle this anger, which only made me angrier. I thought my brain was messed up, and that’s how it was. I didn’t think sauna would be able to help me, but sure enough, something changed. The anger didn’t go away, but it wasn’t persistent. It would come and go, which was much better than just being mad at everything all the time. I also got my appetite back and could fall asleep easier and stay asleep longer.
Following this were Objectives. I hated doing objectives, but the result was far greater than anticipated. The most significant change I’ve seen since I had arrived happened in the objectives room; I had two life-changing realizations about myself that were worth every second of the processes. I realized why, throughout my life, I’ve made such a horrific choice without a second thought as to the consequences and why I gravitated so naturally to such terrible decisions that I don’t have to do it anymore. I also figured out where that anger came from and why it persisted for so long, and then I became angry with myself. I finally came to terms with the choices I made that made me so angry for so long, and the anger dissipated from me for the first time.
“In life skills, the real meat and potatoes of the program, I learned I created my own circumstances in life, and I finally stopped blaming other people for my emotions.”
In life skills, the real meat and potatoes of the program, I learned I created my own circumstances in life, and I finally stopped blaming other people for my emotions. In objectives, I found peace within myself and my choices, and in life skills, I found peace with others and their choices. I also discovered who I really am and that “who I am” is not the same as what other people have told me. I had had these confused for many years, and I finally figured out who I am to me. This was huge!
The rest of the conditions were that I addressed past situations I had run from and never actually handled people I hadn’t spoken to in years. I finally took responsibility for what I did to damage our relationship and took the necessary steps to begin repairing that relationship. In short, I’ve handled more than I ever imagined I would and I have a brand new life.
T.L., Narconon Graduate
